"Last Friday Night"

The title of this entry really makes no sense to what I'm writing, but I love me some Katy Perry and this is the song playing right now.

God is funny! I love how He has set up our lives like a giant obstacle course. No really, I love it! It keeps us on our toes...it tests our faith in Him...it makes us better people. I also love how He places people in our lives at the exact moment we need them. For example: Chase. I love who I've become since I met Chase. My life took a very sudden and unexpected turn when I met him. We are coming up on our 3rd anniversary in September and it feels like we've been together for an eternity! We've been through so much in the past few years that would have usually created a fragile relationship and yet our love for eachother and for God has only gotten stronger. Those obstacle courses are all over our lives! We approach each one carefully, work our way through it and come out at the end ready to conquer the next. If we didn't have a wonderful and beautiful God watching over us, I don't think we could have made it this far! "Savior please, keep saving me"!!

So onto adoption news! We are still waiting on 2 of the 3 broadcasts we were submitted to. We found out last week that one of the little girls found a forever family! That was our first "no" and we handled it beautifully! Of course, nobody likes rejection, but it is what it is! It only means our precious angel is still out there waiting for us! KEEP ON PRAYIN'!!!! We also found out that our agency in Conroe will continue to work with us once we move! I'm so relieved! Now we start moving our lives and ALL of our STUFF once again! At least this time,we'll have LOTS of family around us for support!!

I want to put a prayer request out there for those of you who read this! My dad is soon going to schedule his bypass surgery so we need some prayers to be sent up for my dad's health, safety and quick recovery AND also for the surgeon - that God will watch over him and guide his hand as he heals my daddy's heart!

"Wherever You Will Go"

Since my last post, we've recieved 2 more broadcasts. We said yes to both of them. We are suckers. I had a bit of hesitation to one but we said yes anyway. We found out today that we were not chosen for her. God shows himself more and more everyday. I am now 100% confident that He has our baby picked out for us. We just have to remember that and to practice our patience. I have a wonderful sense of peace about this whole experience. It's actually quite enjoyable. I don't have any stress. I think I've finally learned how to give it all to God...well...most of it! :)

Other big news in the Dodson family...WE'RE MOVING! Chase was offered a great opportunity with HEB and it just so happens to be in Beaumont! The day he got his offer, I started to send our my resume to a couple of positions I saw advertised. The next day, I got a phone call to set up an interview. Two days later, I drove to Beaumont for an interview and by 7:00pm that same night, I HAD A JOB! God answers prayers and clears paths that we would have never thought possible. Add to that - my parents have a townhouse on the market for about a year now, so we'll be able to live there until it sells! YAY!!!!

I'm off to pack now...we have a lot of work ahead of us! I'll update soon...hopefully with some really great news!!!!

"You Ain't Seen Nothin' Yet"

I don't know if any of you have known anyone or been involved in adoptions through the state. If you have, you will understand what the past 2 days have been like for us. If not, you have NO idea how our lives have been turned upside down...in the best possible way! :) Let me tell you how that past few days have been...

I finally got around to bringing our scrapbook to the agency. This is what CPS will look at along with our home study to make decisions. We hadn't had any "broadcasts" (profiles of children looking for a family) and didn't think it would happen for a while so I thought I had plenty of time. As I was driving back to work from dropping the book off, Cynthia, our family specialist, gave me a call to verify my email address. No biggie. I get to work and check my email to find our very first BROADCAST!!!! A BEAUTIFUL little boy - one year old - perfectly healthy and happy - rights already terminated which means straight adoption. I called Chase and very quickly told her YES, we are interested! Now we wait! Our home study has been submitted and CPS will take the next several weeks to look everything over. They will then choose 3 families. The case workers for these 3 families will appear before CPS on behalf of the families and a decision will be made. GEEZ!!!

I'm not getting my hopes up. I know that if this little boy is meant to be ours, He will make it happen. If not, it just means that our baby is still out there!!!

THEN we got another phone call this evening from Cynthia. This one was much different. A newborn baby needs a foster home. The only information she had was that the baby is the 12th child of this mother, no drugs in the system and is being released from the hospital tomorrow. I called Chase frantically and after a super quick discussion, we decided no. We aren't ready for the emergency calls. We knew they were possible, just not ready for the real thing. We are creating our game plan tomorrow in case we get another phone call like that! I'm confident that when the right situation presents itself, we'll know...without hesitation!

Please pray for us. I faithfully and whole heartedly believe in the power of prayer. It works.

I'll update with any new news or information I receive! G'night! :)

"Head Over Feet"

When I think really really hard, I can remember when things weren't so stressful. I remember when my primary concern was what to wear to school in the morning or what I was going to do for the weekend. I remember when everything was easy. I know at the time, I thought it was so difficult and so unfair. Why is it that we can't recognize the ease of life until it's too late? I'm ready for my life to get easy. I'm ready for things to calm down and really enjoy the blessings that I have been given. I'm ready to have our family complete, I'm ready to spend more time with my husband, I'm ready to settle down, I'm ready! I feel like I'm waiting for something to come along and make it all smooth. I know that in reality, there will always be something and I just need to get out there and make the most of my life because it will all soon pass me by.

I received another phone call today. This time it was from our Family Specialist, Cynthia. I remembered her from one of our training classes and she remembered us (probably because I ask so many questions). She is an adoption specialist. They had some questions regarding whether we should be with an adoption specialist or a foster to adopt specialist. The fact that we ultimately want to adopt is what made the final decision. She explained how the process would go and clarified a lot of my concerns. I asked if we would know the date for TPR if we foster to adopt legal risk, I asked what the liklihood of having a newborn would be and I asked how we get chosen if we say yes to a "broadcast"! WHEW! It was a lot to take in and I admit that it got me a bit emotional. I was trying not to let her know, but I think she heard it in my voice - it was just so overwhelming. She said "this is going to be an emotional time for the both of you and you need to be sure you are praying and talking"!

I know that I'm much more emotional than Chase, especially when it comes to things like this. I always feel a bit insecure whenever I open up to him about my feelings because I'm not sure if he would understand. Now don't get me wrong, he has never made me FEEL insecure, I think that's just me being afraid of opening up too much. I remember writing a blog years ago about my guard that I would put up. I didn't want anyone to know what I was feeling because I believed that would keep me from being hurt. It was easier not to involve anyone in my personal life and I was coming to terms with being single for the rest of my life. Then I met Chase. I can't be like that with Chase. He's my husband and I fell in love with him because he made me feel comfortable and because I know he loves with without any reservation.

Each person I've spoken to at our agency has ended the phone calls pretty much the same. PRAY! I pray every day. It's my own time with God and I can talk to Him about anything and everything. I thank him for my blessings and offer up any worry and concern and every now and then I cry. I'm just not so great at letting ALL of the worry and concern go. I've asked Chase to start praying with me. It's something we've always wanted to do and then we let life get in the way. Too tired, too late, too early, too lazy. We've had every excuse you can think of. We have too much going on in our lives to take prayer for granted. He listens...He guides...He answers prayers....He provides miracles and blessings...He takes away our pain and worry.