Thursday, May 3, 2012

"It's Your Love"

Baby Girl is officially 4 months old!  I cannot believe it!  I feel like only yesterday I was holding a tiny little 5 week old!  She went for her 4 months shots and weighed in at 12lb 7oz and 24.5 inches long!  Unfortunately for us, we don't have a pediatrician who tells us precentiles, but from what I figure, she is in the 25-50% with height and 10-25% with weight (wow....those are some BIG gaps)!!!! We are slowly introducing cereal although she has NO idea what to do with a spoon! :)  Now if I can only get her to start pushing up!!  She WILL NOT do it...she scoots around using her legs but that's about all!  We just have to keep trying and one day I know she will catch on!

Now an update on progress!  In my last post I told you guys about her first visit with her mom and that we were going to weekly visits every Friday!  Last Friday I got to the CPS office a couple of minutes early when her case worker came out to tell me that her parents had called about a minute before to let her know they did not have a ride to the visit.  I could tell she was very frustrated and said that when she tried to call back , there was no answer.  Today Chase called me at work to let me know that our case worker called him.  Baby girl's parents cancelled their visit this Friday as well.  Hmmmm....

I would like to speculate on WHY these have been failed visits, but I have chosen to just enjoy that extra hour I get with this precious angel!  I made a decision last week that I know I have attempted several times before.  I have give it all to God.  I can't do this anymore!  The idea of "what if" was consuming my entire day...everything I did.  I would cry every single time I talked about our "situation".  I decided that I CANNOT do that anymore. I need to be the best mom I can be and if I'm sitting around boo hooing all day, I can't do my job!  She needs me to be here for her now and I can't do that while I'm trying to predict the future.  Afterall, it's not my call!  I have left it all for Him...He will take care of us as He always have.  We are also very blessed to have such an awesome amount of support around us as we go through this. 

On a final note, Baby Girl's baby dedication was this past Sunday!  We wrote a bio that was read as we stood up in front of our church family:

"Baby Girl" was born on December 31, 2011.  She came into our lives on February 7 as our very first foster placement.  From the moment we laid eyes on her, we were in love.  She has blessed our life in more ways than we could ever have imagined.  She has a beautiful smile that lights up the room and without a doubt, will have the personality to match.  Her big beautiful eyes take in everything around her and she is growing and learning new things every day.  We are so blessed to be witnesses to this perfect miracle.  Today we are dedicating her so that she will truly understand our love and devotion to her; that no matter what the future holds, God will always have his arms around her keeping her safe.